The Original Sharkmobile

ZW Submission: [anon]

Here’s a great opportunity to own a piece of Sharkey history……

http://m.cartwrightmotors.com/#/vehicle/5856964

6

*Somebody get on the phone to the White House! This piece of American history belongs in The Smithsonian. -Rogaine

  • Sir TTP

    Carfax shows 34 entries for this bad boy, not including the vomit and semen stains.

    Speaking of semen stains, I’m sorta shocked this wasn’t scooped up in a private sale by Hooman.

    • Maia

      Were 33 of those accidents?

      • Sir TTP

        PNAK has the skinny. I’m sure he’ll remind us…

      • Scott Toyoyota

        you dam sure know it wasnt oil changes!!

  • Maia

    Bwahaha! A BIG Wheel would be more reliable! As an aside, the old Sharktales post at the Pahrump winery is now on the other site. They’re late to the dance!

    • Sir TTP

      I just looked. It ain’t got no teeth. Lame AF.

  • Maia

    Only a real dipwad would spend 7k on a 12 year old BMW.

    • Sir TTP

      You could be proud owner #6 of this fine vehicle. Cartwright lists it in “excellent” condition – LOL.

      • Maia

        HA! What a joke! That means Mr. Tales most likely did not report an accident or 3!

      • Pam

        Thats crazy. It is hard to keep a car in excellent condition for 12 years. Especially after all the accidents and the repo man picking it up 4 times a year. When i totalled my car in january its condition was “good”. It was 10 years old and i was basically the only owner. I bought it a year old. After 10 years of tiny spills and normal wear and tear a 3 series would be pretty worn unless he had it re upholstered.

    • Mixx_TheFinalCut

      Dipwad > Sharkey

  • rainmn066

    How did his court case go monday

    • Donnie Darko

      It was a preliminary hearing. He plead not guilty, trial is set for Oct 19th. That was the 1st available date for the public defender.

  • Mixx_TheFinalCut

    Nice Dent. I wonder which one of his Domestic Battery charges is responsible for the damage

    • The_Truth_Hurts2012

      That dent is from some heavy girls leaning against it..

      • nancy young

        Hahaha. Andrea’s 2nd trimester

  • Persephone

    Did he put some sort of exhaust enhancing system on that bad boy? I can visualize the shitty shocks and hear the sputter while he’s bouncin around town. When he saw all the millennials driving the EXACT same thing-because they do, he decided he needed something to look down upon.

  • Donnie Darko

    When they show close ups on the dealer website, the leather seats are ripped, cracked, worn out, looks like shit. Hey Andrew, you forgot to mention owned by the most infamous poser, joke in the the history of Las Vegas.

    Vehicle Description

    What a terrific deal! Wow! What a sweetheart! Here at Cartwright Motors, we try to make the purchase process as easy and hassle free as possible. We encourage you to experience this for yourself when you come to look at this wonderful 2004 BMW 3 Series. Be prepared to be transformed when you get behind the wheel and feel the power surge right into your very soul as you mash the gas and zoom off over the horizon. New Car Test Drive said, “…occupants are treated to elegant, businesslike interiors…roomier, smoother and quieter than ever…”

    To see more quality vehicle like this one right here just click http://www.cartwrightmotors.com/ or dial 702-476-6867.

    • OldWineBox

      It will go down in history as the first case ever of someone getting AIDS from a car seat.

    • Persephone

      Hah! Usually they can smooth that out, can’t they? If all these dumb females can make themselves more marketable you’d think a car dealership could

    • Mixx_TheFinalCut

      “..ripped, cracked, worn out, looks like shit.”

      For a minute there, I thought you were describing his mug!

  • not2slobro

    cartwrights maybe know more about horses…..than cars when they got this one

  • Donnie Darko

    Is this the truck Sharkey bought? Did they not take it off the website or is this a different one? That much money for an 8 year old truck? It’s low mileage, diesel, but still.

    http://www.cartwrightmotors.com/2008-Chevrolet-Silverado-2500HD-LTZ-Las-Vegas-Nevada-89119/5899822

    • The very same one. “My new truck , It’s totally custom bruh….”

      • Donnie Darko

        OK, $46,977 plus 8% sales tax, plus $400 tag/title=$51,135, let’s say Andrew gave him $3,000 off the sticker.

        $48,135 at lets say 17.99 APR X 60 months = $1,222 a month assuming he didn’t have a down payment. How long until the repo man shows up?

        • Sir TTP

          No way they have him 17.99 APR. That would be the minimum.

          • 24.99% or whatever the legal state max limit is in NV. I would be willing to bet he is in a glorified “rental” agreement that equates to something even more ridiculous.

          • Sir TTP

            Yep.

          • Donnie Darko

            Based on the rental listings you pulled up for his neighborhood this idiot is paying roughly $400 a month more for his car than his condo.

          • Sir TTP

            Exactly.

          • Donnie Darko

            Legal Maximum Rate of Interest

            No limit for what parties may contract; otherwise prime rate of Nevada’s largest bank plus 2%

            Nevada Statutes 99.040, et seq.: Interest Rates

            Penalty for Usury (Unlawful Interest Rate)

            Interest Rates on Judgments

            Contract rate or prime rate at largest bank in Nevada plus 2%

            Nevada Statutes 17.130: Computation of Judgment Interest

            Exceptions

            Licensee may lend at any interest rate

            Nevada Statutes 677.730: Licensee Interest

          • Habib Fazil

            I’d kill to read that agreement, the boy is being screwed, without lube and NO reach around either…

          • Sad part is that with his credit, criminal and employment history he is lucky to get ANY financing or credit whatsoever and he knows it. He would agree to anything.

        • Mixx_TheFinalCut

          Nice Investment. If he loses his Condo when he gets locked up, he can ‘hide” the truck and live in that when he gets released..

          • Habib Fazil

            Think he’d be better off with a van down by the river…

          • Mixx_TheFinalCut

            only if there’s free WiFi available

          • Scorpio

            He could be a motivational speaker.

          • Sharkey’s Wallet

            90 pairs of Aldo shoes and belts my friend. Maybe some guess jeans from 2004 that are all ripped at the bottom since all Sharkey’s jeans are too long.

        • Habib Fazil

          by the end of the fourth month, assuming he hasn’t totaled it or hidden the damn thing…

      • Mixx_TheFinalCut

        Looks like someone is colorblind over there!

        • Well that is because the *original* color was Victory Red before LOL

          “Vandalism report” on the carfax

          • Mixx_TheFinalCut

            so the exact opposite of what #MogulLaDouche did to the Beemer!

          • The_Truth_Hurts2012

            so, he bought the truck, tore up the paint; reported vandalism and then repainted truck?

          • This “vandalism” was prior to Sharkey back in 2007.

    • Persephone

      Uhh that’s pretty expensive. Maybe that’s the mileage on the second engine?

      • Persephone

        I could think of other cars I would want to spend $50,000 on.

        • Pam

          I really want a cayenne. I bet u could find a nice one for 50k.

          • Persephone

            I like those

    • nancy drew

      If that is sharkey’s car, then you know with all the interest he’s paying the out the door price of that vehicle is about 100k

      • Mixx_TheFinalCut

        and yet he can’t pay off $850.00 for that pesky little thing called a MANDATORY COURT FINE. smh

  • Voody

    that thing isn’t worth 3k, the seat probably stink like meth sweat.

    • Sir TTP

      I’m still awaiting a response from the crack sales team at Cartwright. Can’t wait to see what kind of bullshit reply I get.
      ..

      • Digitus impudicus

        LOL! You should have called yourself Art Vandelay!

        • Sir TTP

          LOL. Whatever I call myself, I know karmicreation/bloodandhoney or whatever psychotic persona Cousin Fucker’s dreamed up this week will Google the shit out of it (when she’s not posting 8,000+ useless hashtags on her most recent twitter incarnation).

          • MissPell

            Don’t forget her 350+ tweets a day. lol

          • Sir TTP

            LOL – I just looked. 8,129 tweets in like four days. Plus a shitload more on IG, Facebook and some garbage wordpress account. Oh and Google Plus.

            Some serious 5150 shit.

          • MissPell

            I don’t know how anyone normal could have the time for that. How does she even have followers. lol

          • Sir TTP

            Well, as to the your first comment, you sorta answered your own question. As to the second, it’s because she’s leeching on to a tragedy that occurred in Orlando and hashtagging the absolute shit out of everything with the most obvious tags using her latest LGBT persona.

            That said, Ted Bundy would have had followers if Twitter was around in his day.

          • Pam

            Even someone smoking meth. I will break out the calculator in a min and figure out how many tweets that is per hour . that just almost seems impossible

          • Habib Fazil

            so pray tell, exactly what part of the planet has she saved?

          • That’s insane

      • Mixx_TheFinalCut

        Nicholas Homanski? Is that play on Nik Hooman?

        • Sir TTP

          Good eye.

      • Voody

        That’s great! Lol

    • Digitus impudicus

      Eau de desperation!

    • Pam

      Cheap cologne and body odor. The only saving grace is that he rode around with the top down often which had to help air it out

  • Sir TTP

    The second review down on Yelp tells you all you need to know about these shady fucks. It’s a good read…

    http://www.yelp.com/biz/cartwright-motors-las-vegas

    • MissPell

      This one further down the page is good…
      lol

  • Only Sharkey would be the one with the black eye .

    • Maia

      And Andrea would be the one with the black guy.

  • MissPell

    What they REALLY need to put in the ad is ‘sanitized for your protection’.

  • Not as much as Twink-182 enjoys lemon parties.

  • Снайпер

    This reminds me of that craigslist post selling that couch from Miami’s club Mansion, the one that some dude took a crap on and God knows how many other people did all and sundry upon. It was posted on the other site lol… Do not have time to look for it.

    • MissPell


      (WARNING!)

      • Снайпер

        THANK YOU! I couldn’t find it.

        • MissPell

          Your Welcome. 🙂

        • The_Truth_Hurts2012

          WTF……….
          I can’t begin to ask why someone would do that…

          • Donnie Darko

            His stash of cocaine was cut with Miralax.

          • Hey Now

            Fkn lol.

          • Pam

            Haha! I literally laughed out loud when i read that. 🙂

      • Persephone

        Warning to me = “Must look !”

      • Hey Now

        No way!

  • Digitus impudicus

    That totally has to be photoshopped; no way would some chick take a photo like that.

    • Darlene Conner

      Well the black eye for one is not real. Saying that…I would assume most of it is not real LOL.

  • Mixx_TheFinalCut

    Right up Sharkey’s alley!

    • Sammi Jo

      A match made in douche heaven

      • Mixx_TheFinalCut

        LOL!!!

        Douche multiplied by 4!

        • Sharkey’s Wallet

          That dealership looks like a greasy diner.

        • Pam

          Sharkeys feet look small compared to the other men in that pic

  • MissPell

    Sorry I should have put a warning on it. My bad.

    • Mixx_TheFinalCut

      You need lessons from King!

      • MissPell

        I can’t even look at half the stuff he puts up. I just see his name and that he’s posted pics and I just scroll past QUICKLY. LOL

  • Sir TTP

    Sabrina Nellie thinks its hot AF.

    • Mixx_TheFinalCut

      It looks like it came out hot

      • Hey Now

        Steaming!

  • MissPell

    Aaah! Karo your back as you. It’s good to see that again.

  • sangel1215

    I’m so glad I payed all my bills,I’m on my second brand new SUV for less than a $400.00 a month.In all honesty I decided to upgrade to Jeep Cherokee not impressed so far,but I’m grateful. Mogul life isn’t for me,I like things like electricity,water and jeans my mom didn’t wear when she went to the skating rink back in the day..Get a real job,what if it is his kid? He’s already started her on the path to hookerdom Daddy Issues

  • JimU113

    No thanks. I hear it smells like a bad colostomy bag. With a leak.

  • nancy drew

    My favorite part of this photo is the sign behind him that reads “$399 paint jobs”

  • Whitney BeatMe

    If you’re lucky you’ll find the meth stash in it.

  • Pam

    I think they still do that

  • Pam

    I know a guy who lived next door to his mother for several years and she would run outside and call him if an ambulance or fire truck passed their houses. She would call and ask “i wonder where they are going” or who they have, etc. It was funny at first but very odd