Update: There’s A Shark On The Loose

ZW SUBMISSION

[Donnie Darko]

Oh no you didn’t Gupster.  Actually, yep, you did.  It looks like #Moguladouche in now officially on the lam.  Sharkey skipped town today, completely ignoring a court-mandated order to appear, fleeing to San Diego and then Mexico.  Today was actually supposed to be his second court appearance this week after he hired that ambulance chasing attorney for the wrong case on his battery charge.

shark2

sharksecond

Those pesky court orders wouldn’t stop the Shark though…

shark5

Down to San Diego…

shark4

And then crossing the border…is that shit even legal with a bench warrant?

shark3

When does it end?  And how?  I’m giving good odds on a classic made-for-local-news high speed freeway chase in either Cali or Nevada.

Shout out to Donnie and Mixx for the intel.  I was in LA at San Francisco Saloon near the 405 and Pico Blvd. watching Game 5 of the NBA Finals.  Pretty sure Hooman brought over my chicken wings. Anyhoo – The Juice was on the loose doing the slow roll up the freeway with Al Cowlings behind the wheel of that Bronco.  I can totally see the gupster pulling this move, and I’ll be the first one running toward the on-ramp to the freeway with a “Save Sharkey” sign.~SirTTP~
  • Dr. Leo Spaceman

    Clark County Justice Courts are a joke since they cannot keep an eye on this brain dead douchebag.

    • Happy Pants

      Pffft. Like anyone could outwit #Moguladouche.

      • Sir TTP

        Fucking-A right HP. Bev tried to capture the Sharkster, and that slippery dude pulled some James Bond 007 type shit and escaped like it was nothing – save the bumps and bruises incurred from leaping out of a moving vehicle. Dude’s a straight up badass.

        • Persephone

          Speaks volumes.

        • Manic Monkey

          And I know this is not “her” thread, but can I just say how incredibly sad it makes me for her child. Not only did she take that poor girl out into public just DAYS after being born (due to the lack of an immune system, most doctors recommend 6-8 weeks before going out in public) but lets a few waitresses who have UNENDED physical contact with hundreds of people, in a casino no less, around her exposing her to numerous unnecessary dangers of getting sick, but pulls this bullshit too.

          Baby is trying to sleep…so lets blast Wrek it Ralph inches from her head to prove how cute it is that she “loves” mommy’s favorite movie. She doesn’t, poor thing just wants to sleep but Tricia is too stupid to care, as long as mommy looks cute on social media…ugh. Plus, the prescribed formula? Not sure what that is all about…and if Tricia thinks her baby is so damn cute (she really is though) why the fuck can she not take a picture with some stupid bullshit filter on it?

          Ok, I guess I can get off my high horse and end my rant, but I just want to punch this bitch in the face every time her name comes up LOL.

          • It’s bad, everything she has done with that baby is wrong. It kind of hurts my heart.

          • Manic Monkey

            Same here, it really is heartbreaking. That whole fucked up situation is such a tragedy.

        • Luke Duke

          His fight or flight response kicked in and he was gone!

    • Pat Hetic

      They only issued the bench warrant yesterday. They don’t have to go looking for him, he’ll find them soon enough.

  • Olive Blackcock

    When I think of Moguladouche I just want to throw up…

    Warning: Level 1.3 puke on a scale of 5, with 5 being the worst.

    • Appreciate the level disclosure, Olive!

    • Pam

      I’d say that’s closer to a 1.9

    • The_Truth_Hurts2012

      How’d you get that pic of CF?

  • Crossing the border with a warrant has got to be some kind of felony. Good thing he took the bus.

    • JimU113

      Yep. Just fleeing the county would be one.

  • Happy Pants

    I’ll meet you there, Pony.

  • Happy Pants

    *cheers*

  • Tuco Salamanca

    This guy is the quintessential fuck up. If he would just face the consequences maybe he’d a a scintilla of a chance at making his life a little better but that brain of his just doesn’t work that way. Keep diggin the whole deeper shark fails.

    • Dawn D Davenport

      but why why why does he have to augment his loseritis with the white plastic sunglasses? why?

      • MissPell

        The gift shop was all out of American flag ones?

        • Dawn D Davenport

          the ones with slats? Best sellers, yo!

          • MissPell

            lol 🙂

      • Tuco Salamanca

        LMAO!!! I’m dying.

    • Zombie Cyrus

      I still don’t think he realizes that documenting your entire life on Instagram is only for women seeking $clients$ and twinks seeking pay4gay

      • MissPell

        He thinks he’s famous. He doesn’t realize people watch his life because he’s a train wreck waiting to happen over and over again.

        • Mixx_TheFinalCut

          Those nips need their own IG account

          • MissPell

            Don’t give him any ideas. haha

  • countryjew

    There may be a (((master plan))) in progress here.

    Obviously the street hawking is dry right now because summer heat keeps tourists away. He lives paycheck to paycheck so there won’t be any income for 6-8 weeks. Andrea’s about to give birth and you know he don’t want to be around for that shit.

    What better way to disappear than county jail for a couple months. Put the suit, American flag shirts, X-Box games and “custom furniture” in a friend’s garage and go eat for free courtesy of Clark County.

    He gets out in the fall. All the court fines are wiped out because of the jail time, he gets the timeshare gig back, has an excuse for not being able to pursue custody and finds another sucker to sell him Sharkey’s Machine MK III. (Obviously the current MK II will be repo’d.)

    Good plan?

    • Pam

      U might be on to something. But I don’t know that he thinks of the future other than maybe what he’s doing tomorrow.

      • HEARTHSTONEB3TCH

        pam coming thru with a brilliant comment.

    • The_Truth_Hurts2012

      If brains were dynamite, he couldn’t blow his nose. You could of gave him a good idea (if he could read).

    • Penza

      3 hots and a cot, can’t beat that with a stick! Lol.

      • Dead Man’s Dog

        Oh, he’ll be beating off sticks while in jail. Tyrone-sized purple tree trunks

        • Penza

          Nah, his homeboys will protect him. All the other moguls will form a circle around him.

          • JimU113

            A circle of none. That’ll leave a street corner free for the taking.

          • The Beav

            The Psycho Sports Cartel….his new posse of two?!? Bahahahahahahaha

        • JimU113

    • Kuntinka Smirnoff

      the suit, American flag shirts, X-Box games and “custom furniture”…

      …All of his most prized possessions. If your post hadn’t made me laugh so hard, I may have felt a bit bad for lil old pathetic MLD. Hahahahahahaha you are hilarious!

    • JimU113

      Yep, assuming Sharkey’s Machine Mk II isn’t wrecked in the moderate speed chase first.

    • DirtyWhiteGirl

      I doubt this guppy can think past his next meal. #gainz

  • Donnie Darko

    ..

    • Sir TTP

      The_great_gazoo1977 speaks the truth.

      • Genevieve

        Struck a nerve, you did

    • countryjew

      I don’t think Sharkey has figured out how to block people so he only deletes comments.

      • OCgirl12

        Totally lmao!

      • Crabby

        He blocked me.

        • countryjew

          Sorry, I was wrong about this.

      • Blocked me too.

        • countryjew

          I apologize, I was wrong about this.

    • rainmn066

    • Johnny “M’Fing” Drama

      i troll instagram models all day with my real name and profile, zero fucks given. I’ll never troll Mr. Sharkey though, i respect him too much. he’s like an older brother that i’ve never had, but wanted.

      • Da fuq?!

      • HEARTHSTONEB3TCH

        LMFAO. dont say this shit when im high

    • Mixx_TheFinalCut

      That bus picture face is the same one #Moguladouche will be making once the judge hits him with jail time for two FTA’s!

    • Pam

      The second pic is actually more flattering than his usual pics

  • Sir TTP

    With Hooman as the bar back.

    • Screw that, he’ll suck. He needs to be the damn busboy.

      • Sir TTP

        Have a heart. With a failing website, the surgery scam exposed and his useless pill-popping wife around, how’s my man going to pay for that hair transplant? Or is Jenn Dale Bell coming to the financial rescue?

        • countryjew

          I bet Mr. Bell — which one I’m not sure — was being courted as an investor but TD’s failure to shut down this site resulted in that deal being a no go.

  • MissPell

    Don’t worry Clark County PD are on it…
    ha

  • Chalupa Batman

    I feel like he had to threaten and kidnap those people to make them go anywhere with him. We all know you ain’t got no friends (money, ladies, street smarts, etc.), mutha’ fucka’!

    • Sir TTP

      If “living the dream” is a five hour drive in an unlicensed jacked up truck only to get to Mission Beach with outstanding warrants hanging over my head – you have permission to pull the trigger. Repeatedly.

      • Chalupa Batman

        That just gave me anxiety. I’ll make sure there are enough bullets for us both.

  • Sir TTP

    And Jenn Dale Bell is my Best Man. Hope that isn’t an issue.

    • You’ll have to pass that by HP but, I’d feel bad for whoever is the maid of honor.

  • Sir TTP

    Sharkey is rocking this audiobook on his Beats. It’s his tenth time listening to it.
    ..

  • AmericanTopTeam

    The courts really get irritated when you keep pulling no shows he is gonna end up with a no bail warrant and sitting in Clarke County for a month won’t be fun

    • Luke Duke

      Then they will keep resetting it for a few months to fuck with him.

  • MissPell

    I wonder if he thought if his lawyer just showed up at the court house that was going to be enough.

    • Scorpio

      It normally is enough for petty charges like these.

  • Chalupa Batman

    And then when they got up to leave he was like “where yall going??” and they said on a bus to Mexico and then he followed them. That is just as likely as a hostage situation with this dude.

    • Fidel Cashflow

      Most likely. I have watched him invite himself and crash peoples tables at the club numerous times. People are like who the fuck is this guy?

      • Chalupa Batman

        UGH! How can someone be so damn out of touch with reality?? Drugs, I presume.

  • Pat Hetic

    What in ‘Merica hell did that douche smuggle over the border?

    • MissPell

      Male breast implants?

    • Scorpio

      Little blue pills.

  • Persephone

    LOL

  • MissPell

    michelle_honey is a porn star. lol
    https://twitter.com/michellehoney

  • Dawn D Davenport

    the charges are like prostitution…but pain-in-the-ass style!

  • OldWineBox

    It’s pavlovian when I see this man’s face that I think of this.

  • Zombie Cyrus

    Doesn’t want to stop the steroids to become flabby and estrogenic, can’t have the probation drug testing find the steroids.

    A “moguls” conundrum.

  • Seriously

    Lol he definitely rode the bus back to the US I’m an effort to evade BP but, nice try

    • Spartacus

      Was he on the special bus? The one with all the windowlickers?

  • Seriously

    …if you’re okay with accepting rocks as payment.

    • countryjew

      He would interpret that as crack rocks.

      • Seriously

        Lol sad how true that is. I feel like Starkey was meant to live this life as a dog but there was some mix up at “the lab” & he ended up human. He’s so loveable but so dumb.

        • countryjew

          This must be the same lab that “genetically engineered” the “perfect” Jocelyn Cano (see Playboy article posted earlier today).

      • miss piglet

        Ha……

        That made me laugh hard:)

    • Dead Man’s Dog

      Did you mean while in jail? Then it would be ‘cocks’

  • Mixx_TheFinalCut

    Who in the fuck is @marc_alexander? Captain Save-a-Douche?

    • countryjew

      Marc Alexander should show up in court and tell the judge those exact same words.

  • Mixx_TheFinalCut

    Tag says “Hecho en Mexico”
    Sharkey tells everyone it’s an Italian imported rug..

    • BadKitty

      Just like his “Chanel” bar……

      • Pam

        I once bought a fake Chanel purse from china and the tag inside said “made in Paris” but the ‘s’ was backwards. Haha. That was like 12 years ago

  • Mixx_TheFinalCut

    Ha! Looks like Shark Fails budget vacation is over. He’s in Hesperia right now probably heading back home for his battery case tomorrow..he most definitely visits Z-Dub Nation!

    • Mixx_TheFinalCut

      He’s going going, back back, to County County

      • miss piglet

        “Recognize a real Don when you see one. Sippin on booze in the House of Blues”

        Hell No………….

        • Luke Duke

          Back to Cali, strictly for the weather
          Women and the weed, sticky green
          No seeds bitch please, Poppa ain’t soft dead up in the hood ain’t no love lost

      • Pam

        I would never feel clean washing up in a sink so close to a toilet. Grosses me out

      • The_Truth_Hurts2012
  • Gadda Bait

    This fkr thinks he’s Charlie Sheen

  • Scorpio

    He might try out Costa Rica for a while. It looks like a BS charge anyway.

  • What kind of man uses the #nofilter hashtag? Like, yeah Sharkey, no one is looking at you thinking there is no way someone can look that good without having to use a filter. We hope there is no filter, cause of you look like that WITH a filter, then medical science can’t help you.
    I love how he’s shirtless at the beach bar, but his physique, tattoos and weird shadow sleeve like folds on his arm make him look like he’s wearing a long sleeve shirt with a douchey print on it.

    • Mzzy Rivy

      A 16 year old.

    • Luke Duke

      None! Not me or any guy I know.

  • o3mta3o

    That mission beach picture… Did he walk up to a group of kids and ask to take a pic with them or does he actually hang out with people 20 years his juniors?
    He looks like the creepy uncle sitting at the kids table.

  • Dawn D Davenport

    He gets up every morning and chooses his wardrobe. As he stands on his tasteful imported rug aftr arising from his replica of Lucretia borgias dog house. He runs his stubby freckly fingers over the treasures in his jewelry box, a shoebox covered with Robin egg blue paper and the word “Tifany” carefully printed on the front, and he rejected the red rocket Italian horn, the baller medallions on Mardi gras beads, the mod podge paper clip chain, and chose the Greg Brady. Lmao

    • miss piglet

      Fuckin’ Greg Brady

    • HEARTHSTONEB3TCH

      author of the year. love u dawn

      • Dawn D Davenport

        Aww thanks guys!!!!

  • JimU113

    Perhaps Guppey will learn about the Thug Kitchen diet while in the slammer.

    https://www.facebook.com/thefreethoughtprojectcom/videos/vb.1425604894326440/1773889326164660/?type=2&theater

  • Penza

    The cops figure next time they catch him doing something wrong, he’s got an outstanding warrant or two, and they can just haul his sorry ass in. He’s an unwanted fugitive.

  • Unityyy

    He skips town to hang out in Mission Beach when he’s supposed to be in court and he’s going to ask for custody? Yep. That’s going to happen. How does this guy tie his own shoes? Seriously. The stoopid is just overwhelming.

  • miss piglet

    Ahhh, I can see a boobie, lol

    • Mzzy Rivy

      I can see a saggy boobie

      • Mixx_TheFinalCut

        like this?

        • Mzzy Rivy

          Wow heeees HOT. Winner bod! Also I love where they are posting shark on TD and few responses. Joint is deader than the dead presidents.

        • MissPell
          • Mixx_TheFinalCut

            Ha! Tramp Stamp.

          • Sammi Jo

            LMAO!

          • Fidel Cashflow

            Someone needs to paste together a collage of all his patriotic clothing that he bought at Walmart.

          • MissPell

            I can only remember 3 items: tank top, shorts, and a long sleeve shirt. I don’t know what other patriotic clothes he has.

        • The Beav

          The boobs on his back are almost as big as his bitch tits!

  • Penza

    He’s a putz. That’s why he’s got “fail” after his name… he earned it.

  • cray slays

    5 bucks says those beats don’t even work.

  • Whitney BeatMe

    Sharkey, international criminal. Check the tunnel that el chapo escaped from.

  • countryjew

    Oops, I was wrong about this.

  • Scorpio

    It’s just a bench warrant. They don’t go looking for you, but if they pick you up for something else, they will drag you into court.

  • The Beav

    His new crew the “Psycho Sports Cartel” (I seriously LAUGH every time I think of it) will save him! WTF?!? Is that supposed to be? Sounds like something tween boys would think up while they ride bikes. Its so amazingly stupid and funny!

  • Luke Duke

    lol bruh bruh

  • Luke Duke

    Yes by posting on social media for sure. If the judge finds out he won’t be happy.

  • Scorpio

    Exactly. What he should do is go in and take care of it. There would be no further trouble if he simply went into court, apologized to the judge, and paid the fine.

  • Scorpio

    Children who grow up in chaotic homes often become adults who deliberately, though typically unconsciously, create chaos in their lives, because that is what feels normal to them. I do not know anything about this man’s childhood, but I have a few guesses. This therapy session has been brought to you by: Boner pills!

  • Scorpio

    Yup. That is a good example.